Annabeth Goes to Goode Parody
by blank canvas of me
Summary: For all of you out there who wondered, 'why? WHY' while reading an Annabeth Goes to Goode fanfic.


**Annabeth Goes to Goode Parody: **

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**The popular/slutty girl: **

Oh. My. Gawd. She's dating Percy-I'm-so-sexy-Jackson? He's my boyfriend, but don't mind him at all when he screams 'rape' whenever I get near him. He's just shy. And hot! Did I mention sexy? Personalities don't matter at all! It's all about having a hot body, like I do. And not like that blonde girl who says Percy and her are an item. Yeah, right. Percy is the most popular boy in school, and she's, like, so plain! He'd have to be clinically brain dead to be seen with the likes of what's-her-face. She's not even that pretty. I bet she has a makeup brand called 'why bother.' Wait- why is she kissing Percy? And why is he letting her? UGH! I need to tell my clique so we can socially humiliate her. Then Percy would see what a dweeb she is and break up with her for me.

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**The Jock:**

She's ignoring me. Annabeth (I think that's her name. I usually just call her BT. You know?- big tits? she seems to appeal to that nickname) is ignoring my flirtatious and charming attempts to get her to go out *cough* into bed *cough* with me. All because of Jackson. I hate him. He thinks he's so rad, but everyone knows I'm the sexiest man there is. And doesn't blondie know that I don't get rejected? I'm going to win her over, and suck face with her in front of Jackson. Eventually.

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**Monster Teacher:**

FOOD! Half-bloods. Yum-yum. It's not like I'm going to be killed off in the first five chapters to leave room for teenage drama.

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**Percy's friend-who-also-has-a-crush-on-him:**

I've always liked Percy. His eyes, they- ugh, they melt me. They're like tiny pieces of emeralds all different shades. And that thirty-pack! Damn, boy. We've been best friends for a few months, and I finally worked up the courage to ask him out. Wait. Whose that blonde?

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**Percy's guy friend:**

Don't worry. I'm not trying to break up Percabeth. I'm just here to add some bromance to the story.

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**Percy's Sister: **

I'm attracted to the water. I like swimming and marine animals. I'm dyslexic and ADHD and can sometimes control water. I have black hair and green eyes. I'm friends with Percy Jackson, but I have no clue I'm his sister because we're obviously polar opposites.

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**Goth Girl/Emo Boy: **

Don't mind me, I'm just a replacement for Thalia and Nico in case they're not in this story.

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**People-who-don't-believe-Annabeth-is-real: **

Percy claims he has a hot girlfriend in California. Apparently she has blonde princess curls and grey eyes. Yeah, right. The pictures he shows from his expensive iPhone are so photo shopped.

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**Cell-Phone:**

So I guess Half-bloods can carry us around now? Guess I missed the memo. Meh. Just roll with it.

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**Alarm clock: **

I get the first dialogue in the first chapter. And then I get wacked on the head by a stupid, attention-seeking blonde whose tired. *Hairflips* guess that's what you get for being a star.

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**Summary to story:**

I'm a pathological liar. I say I'm not like all the others, but I REALLY AM.

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**Reality:**

"Hey, Annabeth, why don't we have any friends?"

"Shut up, Percy."

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**A/N: I swear, there's something wrong with me. It started off bad, then I started adding inanimate objects, and things sort of got out of control. Okay, I'm sure Percy and Annabeth would have SOME friends. They might be even popular...to some extent. But where in the nine books of PJO/HoO does it state that all the girls from his school fawn over him? In fact, Rick actually shows that he's a loser in school. The Lightning Thief? Battle of The Labyrinth? And you need to consider why Annabeth would go half-way around the world just to be with Percy. She needs a motive. EVERY STORIES THE SAME! Slutty girl. Percy's guy-friend. Some OC demigod. **

**AND WHAT IS WITH THE ALARM CLOCK? It's like no one knows how to start a story that doesn't include: RING, RING! as the first line.**

**There's a rare few that are decent. And I mean RARE. Like, 99.9 percent out of 100 stories are decent. **


End file.
